November 25, 2010

Thanksgiving disaster #1

Don't cool the pumpkin pie on the washer while it's running. Especially if it's a little off balance.

I guess Jaxson isn't suppose to eat this today. He's so sad. :-(

*Yes, I do anticipate more disasters today, but so far Jax bg is in check.

Being Thankful

The holidays are really sneaking up on me this year and I'm just not ready. However, tis the season to be thankful! My heart really isn't in it, but I'm gonna give it a go anyway.

I'm thankful for alarm clocks that wake me at midnight and 3 a.m. Without them I would still be sleeping.

I'm thankful Jaxson still thinks I'm cool, even if his teenage sisters don't.

I'm thankful for 2 teenage daughters who take on the responsibility of caring for their brother to and from school every day and those days when I just need a break.

I'm thankful for a school nurse who looks after Jaxson as if he were her own son.

I'm thankful that my husband has a good job, even if it means he'll be working the holidays.

I'm thankful for finding the D-OC.  It's because of them I'm beginning to regain a bit of my sanity.

I'm thankful for 2 beautiful grand-babies who have opened up a whole new place in my heart I never knew existed.
Monkey Boy

(Yes, I just shamelessly bragged on my grand-babies by showing their pictures! :) Gotta admit it, they're pretty cute, huh?)

I'm thankful that after staring at this blank page forever, I'm starting to find more things to be thankful for.

I'm thankful for the way my daughter Payton makes me feel like a kid again with her crazy antics and obnoxious behavior.

I'm thankful that Jaxson was diagnosed early.

I'm thankful for every chance I get to see Shelby perform on stage.

I'm thankful for Facebook keeping me in touch with family I would otherwise be out of touch with.

I'm thankful for a brave little boy who tells me "mom, you're the best" right before every injection and finger poke.

That wasn't too painful. Therapeutic actually! I know I could find more to be thankful for, but for nearly 3 a.m. this is about all I've got.

Learning to be thankful every day.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

November 22, 2010

Weekly Sugar Bolus

One thing I'm learning around the DOC is that D-Mama's like to have fun and I'm all about being a part of that!!

Houston We Have A Problem

Head on over Houston We Have a Problem to check out Laura's awesome giveaway and see what all the fuss is about!


For the past 2 weeks I've been unable to make any sense of Jaxson's numbers. There is no concise pattern and his blood sugar levels are all over the board. I just don't get it. D wreaks havoc on him emotionally. I hate seeing him in so much distress and discomfort.

Jax BS was 393 and he tested positive for ketones at 4 a.m. this morning. That's a first since his diagnosis. I called endo, gave him 2 units of Humolog, and checked him hourly till 7 a.m., by which time his BS was 106 and ketones were negative. I wanted to keep him home from school, but he insisted on going. I texted the school nurse and filled her in. 

Speaking of our school nurse (Melissa), she takes wonderful care of my son while he's at school and gives me great peace of mind. Besides Jaxson, there are 3 other elementary children with d at his school, one of which is Melissa's son.  Unfortunately for her, I am fortunate to have her looking after my boy... if that makes sense.

There's so much more I want to share today, but I really must get some practice transcriptions done.

D will not kick my ass today!

November 18, 2010

Road Trip: The First Leg

Troy and I had been married for 13 years when we learned I was pregnant with Jaxson. Without a doubt it was a shock and surprise. We currently had 3 daughters; 17, 12, and 10. In our mind we were done having children, but nature decided otherwise. It was so weird. I worried about what people would think. Here I was, 37 and pregnant. (how's that for a show MTV?) When we broke the news to friends and family, they were surprised as well, but supportive. We soon found out that our baby would be a boy. After 3 daughters, that was a pleasant surprise and the girls were excited to have a sibling of the male persuasion.

It was a rough pregnancy. I can't even remember all the tests, but one of them showed that our boy was at a high risk for having downs syndrome. They wanted me to do an amniocentesis but I opted out. If he were going to be born with downs we'd deal with it when the time came. No sense in risking having no baby at all. I was also placed on bed rest in the last trimester because of blood pressure issues, and I was given a steroid injection on 2 separate occasions to ensure his lungs would be developed in case of preterm labor.

We all survived the pregnancy and on September 3, 2005 Jaxson arrived. From the moment I laid eyes on him he had my heart. He just wasn't meant to be and now I couldn't imagine life without him. There he was. My son. Perfect. Healthy.

In just a few years our lives would take a turn and be changed forever. Read D-Tour Ahead for Jaxson's diagnosis story.

November 16, 2010

Thank you D Mamas

I am truly moved by the generous outpouring of support shown to me by the D Mamas in the Diabetes Online Community. In reading all the comments left on my previous post, I was able to see new hope. I am encouraged, refreshed, and ready to face a new day. In the words Wendy left me on my Facebook, "you've stumbled into a fantastic group of women who genuinely care about supporting and encouraging other D Mamas in their journey". I couldn't agree more!!

I am looking forward to making my way around the DOC and getting to know each of you. Thank you for extending your friendship.

November 12, 2010

Finding Support

For the past several days I have been feeling overwhelmed by all that is on my plate. I wish had that picture perfect family that is there for me through life's ups and downs, but that is just not meant to be. I truly feel alone in seeing to it that Jaxson is taken care of properly. My teen daughters are busy with their own lives. They will give me a hand when I ask, but my requests are usually met with indignation, so I stop asking. And dad... I'm sure he means well, but he has really taken a 'hands-off' approach to Jaxson's care since he was diagnosed. Denial? Maybe. But it hurts me deeply.

I think if I could talk with someone who understands, sympathizes and relates I could sort out the clutter in my brain, but I really don't know where to start looking for that either. I am currently contemplating quitting my studies in Medical Transcription because I simply can't focus on it.

Jaxson is THE most important thing to me now. I'm fighting for is life. Have I left my family in the lurch giving all my attention to caring for Jaxson? Are my priorities out of whack? How do I make this work? I don't even know any more. I feel like I'm losing my mind most days. Strong on the surface, but falling apart on the inside.

November 4, 2010

Stop the Presses!!

Click the photo to see the story!
Jaxson, along with 3 other elementary students diagnosed with type 1 diabetes, is featured on the front page of our local paper. I am unfortunately fortunate (if that makes sense) to have a school nurse well-versed in type 1 (because her own son is diagnosed) personally looking after my boy during the school day. It gives me great peace of mind.

November 3, 2010

Speed Bump

I have this tendency to dive head first into things and then end up overwhelmed because my brain just doesn't absorb information that quickly. Especially now that I don't sleep. Okay, okay. I do sleep. Just not as much as I use to. 

During my waking hours I have been making my way around the web reading my way through the many d-blogs out there. I'm thirsty for more information and I'm anxious to be involved and meet other d-folk. All for the sake of my son. Alas, I have reached information overload; one of many speed bumps.

There is a language spoken amongst d-bloggers that I didn't know about and don't quite understand yet. I'm not gonna lie, I feel submerged by the sea of diabetes information that is out there. Not only about diabetes, but the d-community as well. So I ask for your patience. Maybe give me a place to start or teach me the language? Try not to laugh to hard when I use the wrong term or try to sound like I know what I'm talking about. I don't mind gentle correction.. most times. I just need to slow down a little and give things time to absorb, so I hope you'll bare with me and stick around while I get my footing.

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